Grab That Ax and Let's Get Chopping

I can't do that.

I'm not smart enough.

I'm too busy.

What if I go and never get married?

My past is to dark.

You know, we come up with a lot of excuses. God calls, and we become afraid, so we hide behind the shrubs of these lies. We find comfort in the state we are in because it involves no pain, no confusion, and no fear.

It also includes no growth, no impact, no victory, no revival. 

So how's that going for you? Are you willing to look at the cross, see lost souls dying, only to crawl your way back, right behind the shrubs of those lies? Because I know I have done it. It's nice back here. There is shade and I think if I can stretch out my arm far enough I can probably reach some grapes or something.

So God calls.

Will you go? Will you hide? In all reality, God's not on His knees begging you to do it, as if you're the only one. 

No.

If you don't do it, He'll send someone else. But He called you. He called you because He not only wants to make an impact in those lost souls- He wants to make an impact in you. 

So maybe you're not qualified to do the one thing He's called you to. I am certain the reason He does this is so that it can be known among all that it was not you who did this great thing, but God Almighty. 

And I'm about to tell you something, so hold onto your socks because this leaves room for no more excuses.

"God is not looking for ability, but availability," (Holly Wagner).

Where He's calling you will stir up some fear. It will make you cry, and your heart will pound a thousand miles a minute. But when you are at your weakest, that is when God shows up and shows off. 

So I am raising my hand. Send me, God. I am pulling out my largest ax and chopping down these shrubs of condemning lies. (because I own a variety of axes). Shoot, I'm grabbing the shovel and digging out those roots too, because I will not let these lies exist in my life any longer.

God is calling me and He is calling you. 

So look around. Where is God already working in your life? Join Him there. It's not about what great thing you can do, but what great thing He's already doing. That's where we need to be. 

You need to love, because the scowl on your face is not becoming on you.

You need to sing, because your life-song is leading others into the throne room of God.

You need to speak, because when you open up your mouth diamonds come rolling out.

You need to lead, because there is an army rising up, and someone needs to go first.

You need to listen, because no one has ever taken the time to listen to that young lady's story.

You need to fight, because we are on the winning team and we are about to take that land. 

And you need to go. Because He has called you.

He has called you. 

"For we know, brothers and sisters loved by God, that He has chosen you," (1 Thessalonians 1: 4 NIV).

"He has saved us and called us to a holy life- not because of anything we have done but because of His own purpose and grace..." (2 Timothy 1: 9 NIV) 

"Look at the nations and watch- and be utterly amazed. For I am going to do something in your days that you would not believe, even if you were told," (Habakkuk 1: 5 NIV). 

Original Photo Via

A Word's Just a Word

Some people choose a word every new year to determine what they want the year to look like. Some examples I've heard are:

Brave
Create
Achieve

I've never done one of those before, but if I really think about what I'd love my word to be, I'd choose serve.

I want to take the passions God's given me and use it to pour into young girls lives. To dig deeper into the knowledge of God and gain wisdom through His word. I want to become smaller so that He can become bigger in my life. I will put aside my wants and desires and challenge myself more. I will be present in situations and learn what it means to serve on my knees.

Because let's face it, a word's just a word until you make it an action.

And this year, and all the years that follow, I want to serve my God.

"Whoever wants to be first must be slave of all. For even the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many," (Mark 10: 44-45). 

"For whoever wants to save their life will lose it, but whoever loses their life for me will find it," (Matthew 16:25). 

God's Plan + a Step Forward = Abundantly Above

It's so easy for me to get in the woe-me mindset. To forget all that I have and all God's done for me and the blessings he has in store for me. I over think a lot of situations one situation.

He doesn't like me and probably never will, I should just move on. Is this what God has for me? What if it isn't, then I should just forget it. Out of all the ladies he has to choose from, why would he ever choose me?

It's also achieved, without great effort, to notice (as a single lady) the many looks of pity and empathy I get from family and strangers. You poor thing, they say with their eyes, What a lonely life you must lead.

But thing is, as I've been growing to notice, I'm okay with being single. More than okay, actually. I'm excited. Of course I look forward to being in a relationship, but it doesn't make that particular time of my life more important than the one I'm living today. There are times when I think God wants for me to lead a slow and steady life, but I think deep down I know that He has a big plan for me, if only I'll reach out and act. With this in mind, there's no reason for me to pity myself and spend lonely nights at my humble abode, eating ice cream as I sulk and long after a romance similar to the one being portrayed on the screen in front of me. He has a plan for me.

Big plans don't just happen over night. I mean, look at the definition of the word plan.

noun
A detailed proposal for doing or achieving something
verb
2. design or make a plan of (something to be made or built).

A proposal.

This is something God proposes that we do. It's not something that will occur by chance or force, but is something that He elaborately designed for us. It doesn't mean we have to live it out.

I don't think that God designs things half-heartedly. This is the God that designed the blade of grass, soft enough to lay on, yet sharp enough to cut. This is the God that designed the circle of life- the food chain as you may call it- where animals live, eat and die in a wondrous fashion that allows the planet to continue in motion, life and all. This is the God who created the the cell, and the atom. So small that it is entirely impossible to cut in half, but within, stems the genesis of life. This is the God who never before quite or acted on a job half heartedly, and every time, every single time, resulted in something wondrous, beyond what we could fathom.

Just like we are worth more than many sparrows, His plans for us will bring Nicholas Sparks to shame. (Which doesn't really say a lot, seeing as all his books end in tragedy). Let me rephrase; He will put Jane Austen to shame. Or maybe F. Scott Fitsg- okay never mind. You get the point.

Let me finally loop back to long forgotten point: He's a good planner.

So now, as I sit with my Ben and Jerry's and stare longingly at the TV, I remember that He has more for me than this. I glance at my bible protruding from my purse, it's turquoise color appealing to the eye. I think of the cross, Old Testament stories, and also my own.

There is a story here, I think to myself, as beautiful as the one on TV is, there is one that can bring life. I smile this time, thinking of more than just one.

I glance back down at my Bible, and with a click of the remote, it changes everything- one life or thousands, I couldn't know- as I reach down and grab it.

Now to Him who is able to do exceedingly abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that works in us, to Him be glory in the church by Christ Jesus to all generations, forever and ever. Amen. (Ephesians 3:20-21).

Photo Via 

The Next Stage of Life and My Advice To High School Students.

KJ Photography

I'm seeing the transformation occur, slowly but surely.

1. First, I turned eighteen- no big deal.
2. I got rid of some stuffed animals. I don't care who you are, that's a big deal.
3. Then  I actually started thinking about living arrangements. Will I live with my sister after high school, or will I find another friend to room with?
4. Then my job: will I get hired by Dr. Danesh as a Medical Assistant? Maybe I should try to get hired at an ultrasound facility.
5. I even created a new pinterest board: Home Décor. Which, by the way, has really cute decorating ideas for a cute little home, if you want to check it out.
6. And get this; I even bought appliances (for example cups, flower vases, carpets, pots, ect) from this cute little thrift shop by Arbys. What a steel.

I don't know what's gotten into me! I'm not trying to grow up fast, I'm just really excited about this new stage of life. I'm excited to decorate a house, to live with that responsibility, to have my own dog. I'm excited for it. I graduate June 6th, and from there, it's free game. I do what I want when I want. I have to learn what to do- how to survive in the world- on my own.

But right now I'm still in high school, and I still have to take my finals and do my homework and make it through all the way to the end. It's really not too far off. And I still have to live through prom. Alone. A girl's worst nightmare. It's hard seeing all my friends going with someone and getting asked in the cutest ways. I guess that's just not what God wants for me. I don't even know why I'm going. Oh well, I already bought my dress (and its insanely beautiful. I'll have to post some pictures).

Throughout all this change, it would mean nothing if I wasn't doing what God wants me to. So that's what I'm going to be praying for, for the next couple months. God's really blessed me by showing me where He wants me, and I just pray that He continues to do so.

If I could give any advice at all to those still in high school, it's this:

1. Love your parents, and don't take advantage of them or any of the things they do. They love you like crazy and we only get 18 years or so to live with them. It goes by too fast.

2. Don't mess around during school. Do your work. Get it done and strive to do your best. It will pay off.

3. Don't fit in. The world and everyone around you will make it seem like you're not good enough, but in reality, they are feeling the same way. Be you. And don't let anyone bring you down for that.

4. Make a difference. There's so much that can be done for the furthering of God's Kingdom during high school. Grab the word of God and soak it up. And then let it out. Let God's love shine forth from your life, as you change the lives of others around you.

5. Pray. Some of you might think, I'm not quite sure how to. I say, WHO CARES! Talk to God. That's all he wants. Talk to Him and tell Him everything. pray for family and friends. You can only grow in your relationship with Him if you're talking to Him and reading His word. Because, guess what: That's where He talks back.

"Don't let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for the believers in speech, in conduct, in love, in faith and in purity," (1 Timothy 4:12).

Becoming Girls Conference | Becoming Brave

It wasn't the conference that changed my life. It wasn't the Candy/ Popcorn bar. It wasn't the totally cute totes or the brave face paint. It wasn't the cute colors or the wonderful worship songs.

What changed my life was God.

It was the months of preparation. It was the weekly meetings with my new, dearly cherished friend JoAnna, where she watched me cry countless times as we both pored out our hearts. It was how God stretched me farther than I ever planned or thought possible. It was the passionate prayers I prayed alone in my car.

God changed me. He grew me. And now, I will never worship the same, pray the same, or live the same.

On my way home from the conference, I was was so insanely sad because it was over! But I also rejoiced because I watched God move in the lives of so many women, young and old. I didn't want it to end, because I didn't want God to stop using me.

And that is something He will definitely NOT do. He wants to use me, and He wants to use you. We just need to take those steps.

Im so excited- scared but excited- for what God has in store for me next.

There is no greater joy than to worship and serve my God, who loves me.

Becoming Beautiful | Journey Into Speaking

Wow! I finally have an hour to myself! I don't know about you, but my schedule has been insane.

About a month ago, I was asked to co-teach a workshop at the Becoming Brave Conference. Oh, and the topic? Thanks for asking:

Becoming Beautiful.

In no way did I feel qualified enough to speak on this topic, because for one, I'm only seventeen. And for two, this is stuff I struggle with myself. We really had to dig deep into what it really means to be beautiful, and it's completely put me in check.

At first, I didn't want to speak. I thought people wouldn't listen to someone their age. Maybe they'd think I thought I knew everything (which I definitely do not).

So, I just thought I could help JoAnna get stuff together and then let her speak. But you know what happened?

I opened up my bible and I believe God was speaking to me.

"Do not be afraid; keep on speaking, do not be silent. For I am with you, and no one is going to attack and harm you, because I have many people in this city," (Acts 18:9-10).

God's been growing me like crazy lately. I spoke on the topic at a bible study, and I know I'm not the best speaker. I stutter and loose my track of thought, but if God speaks even to one person through me, what I've done was worth it.

I want to do the things The Lord wants me to. Most of the time, the things he asks are scary- really scary (or so I've noticed)- but completely worth it in the end. Let's become brave and do something. I need to learn to see the opportunities God places in my life, and then act on it.

Listen to Paul's words:

"I only know that in every city the Holy Spirit warns me  that prison and hardships are facing me. However, I consider my life worth nothing to me; my only aim is to finish the race and complete the task The Lord Jesus has given me- the task of testifying to the good news of God's grace," (Acts 20:23-24). 

Be brave and listen to the voice of the One who calls you daughter.

Women and Leading Worship

The other day, I was put down a little. I heard that there were guys in the church that couldn't worship under a woman worship leader. I thought, is it the same for every guy? And if it were, why was I even up there leading?

And then God reminded me, like he always does, that He is in control. I opened up the book, Lioness Arising (that I've been completely lagging on reading), and He used it as a tool to get His point across to me. You see, I was struggling with the idea that I was completely worthless as a worship leader. If half the congregation couldn't worship because of me, then why don't I have someone else step up instead of me?

Lisa Bevere made a wonderfully valid point when she said,

"Why is it that whenever a gender discussion comes up, it seems to mire down into an issue of women's submission to men? If I am a leader, it is because God made me one."

And if someone wants to worship God, nothing will stop them. Not annoying lights, or a too loud base. Not an upset stomach, or a terrible guitar player. Not a cramped room, and not a woman worship leader. Worship is a lifestyle, and has a personal meaning to you and a personal way of doing so.

"Our fire does not burn on the alter of worship. Our fire resides within as we are consumed and propelled by his Spirit," (Bevere).

In the end we all have the same mission. I will continue to lead worship for as long as the Lord calls me to do so. I will do it for God and for the one's who desire to lift up praise to our God. And you have a purpose too. There will be people who discourage you, but don't lose heart, because you are empowered. Do not let anyone tell you otherwise.

"Do you hear the a cry and the desperate need for you to rise up as a fearless seeker of truth?" (Bevere).

"Don't let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for the believers in speech, in conduct, in love, in faith and in purity" 1 Timothy 4:12.

I'll end this post with 1 Corinthians 11:10-12.

"Don't, by the way, read too much into the differences here between men and women. Neither man nor woman can go it alone or claim priority. Man was created first, as a beautiful shining reflection of God- that is true. But the head on a woman's body clearly outshines in beauty the head of her 'head,' her husband. The first woman came from man, true- but ever since then, every man comes from woman! And since virtually everything comes from God anyway, let's quit going through these 'who's first' routines."

Who are we to decide who God is and isn't capable of using. He can, and will, use anyone who is willing. So let us now work together for the furthering of his kingdom, and stop holding each other back.

A Heart of The Martyred

Photo From Up North

There's something about the martyred that makes me feel so superficial. Listen. There are people in other countries being killed in the name of our God, while we're over here in (God bless) America either:
 
A. feeling sorry for ourselves for some pointless reason  
Or
 
B. Even questioning the existence of our papa in heaven.  
Heart breaking. Just simply heart breaking.
 
Those of you that are sulking in your own gloom: I get it- I really do. We all have our own problems, and no matter how big or small to the world, the pain is very real in our own lives. But the beautiful picture in all this is that no matter how angry or upset you are, either at your situation or at God, he will never walk away. He's sitting right next to you, and he cares about every single tear that falls from your eyes. Every single one. He's okay with your anger because, guess what: he's God. He can handle your irritability.
 
Sometimes, life just seems too hard to handle. Like it's impossible to go on. And like I once heard: sometimes, in life, it IS impossible to go on.
 
But not with Jesus.
 
It will never be too hard to handle if you have Jesus and you let him help you through your problems. He wants to help, and he's waiting for you to realize that you can’t make it on our own. And when you finally understand that you need him, just remember that he's right there, ready to jump in and save your life.
 
Okay. Now for those of you that are part of group two. I'm not going to sit here and defend Jesus, because he's God. He doesn't need my defense. But let me just tell you something. There are a lot of things in this world that I'm not sure of, but there is one thing that I absolutely know- one truth among all the lies- and that's that Jesus Christ is the son of God and he saved me from my wicked sin, and he is with me every movement of every day cheering me on as I fight this deadly battle here on earth. He's got this book of battle strategies for us so that we'll always be able to make it out alive.
 
Look at this world and imagine there being no love. Think of the darkness there would be. More than there is, even now.
 
"whoever does not know love does not know God, because GOD IS LOVE" 1 John 4:8  
The people being martyred know this love. How could they not? They are willing to go through the most excruciating torture so that this Love can be shown.
 
People don't just wake up in the morning and decide to do things like that.
 
There are few things in this life that we' be willing to die for. So here's the question: would we die for Jesus?
 
We know what he did for us on the cross. Would we be willing to deny ourselves, take up our crosses and follow him?
 
Instead of worrying about little things and trying to argue who's right and who's wrong (because we know who's right and it's not something we need to argue, but share), maybe we can have a change of heart. If we DO have this heart transformation, maybe- just maybe- we could really make a difference in this world.
 
We wouldn't be concerned with ourselves and the things we want, but instead, all we would want to do is what Jesus wants, and to become the men and women that God created us to be. I'm not saying we all need to go to a foreign country and die, but we have the potential to do things that we'd never think possible. You're not going to make any impact whatsoever on this world, if you sit idly by, doing nothing. Don't let this world miss out on God's love. Do something that will make this gift of life that God gave you, worth it. You're stronger than you give yourself credit for.  
If only we would remember God and have a Heart of The Martyred.
 
-Bailey
 
"whoever wants to save their life will lose it, but whoever loses their life for me will find it." Matthew 16:25